Wednesday, July 11, 2007

How Not to Avoid Jury Duty

"The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races."
--Homer Simpson's advice on how to avoid Jury Duty
In further proof that Massachusetts, not Vermont, should be the true home of the Simpsons, a Falmouth man took that advice to heart on Monday. He's now looking at possible charges for perjury. Here's a partial transcript of his interview courtesy of the Boston Globe:
"You say on your form that you're not a fan of homosexuals?" Nickerson asked Ellis, according to the preliminary transcript.

"That I'm a racist," Ellis interrupted, according to the transcript. "I'm frequently found to be a liar, too."

"I'm sorry?" Nickerson said.

"I said I'm frequently found to be a liar," Ellis replied.

"So, are you lying to me now?" asked Nickerson.

"Well, I don't know. I might be."
The punchline of the story is that the man's mother is now forced at the end of the article to stick up for her son by claiming that he really is a racist liar. Now that's motherly love.